Vyeshev, Sex work, and Sperm / וישב, סעקס־אַרבעט, און זרע

This is a weekly series of frum, trans, anarchist parsha dvarim [commentaries]. It's crucial in these times that we resist the narrative that Zionism owns or, worse, is Judaism. Our texts are rich—sometimes opaque, but absolutely teeming with wisdom and fierce debate. It's the work of each generation to extricate meaning from our cultural and religious inheritance. I aim to offer comment which is true to the source material (i.e. doesn't invert or invent meaning to make it more comfortable for us) and uses Torah like a light to reflect on our modern times.

Content note: Discussion of sex work and violence against sex workers; rape by deception; mention of slavery. No graphic descriptions.

Yōsef's has prophetic dreams about his impending success; I have anxious dreams about breaking Shabos. The story of Yōsef's brothers plotting to kill him and then selling him into (pleasant?) slavery is rich and disturbing, but I'm going to focus on the interlude story of Vyeshev: Tomor stealing sperm from Yehuda and the case for decriminalizing sex work.

Tomor is the first undeniable sex worker in Torah (arguably Soreh and Dinoh could be considered sex workers, but that's not clear from the text.) Not only is Tomor a sex worker, but she's presented as an entirely righteous woman.

Tomor is entitled to marry Yehuda's son, but Yehuda doesn't arrange it, so Tomor deceives Yehuda through "harlotry" and becomes pregnant. Sex work is a means to an end, and though it is initially presented as beneath her status and she is about to be burnt alive for it, she remains righteous and does not shame Yehuda, even in the face of death.

Yehuda had three sons; the eldest, Er, married Tomor, but was struck dead by Hashem for his unspecified wickedness. Tomor married her brother-in-law, Yehuda's second son Ōnon, but he too was killed by Hashem for the sin of "spilling his seed on the ground" rather than impregnating her. From this we derive the excellent word onanism (Rashi says this is also Er's sin). Yehuda had one final son, Shelo, who wasn't grown yet; he promised Tomor that she can marry Shelo when he's ready. Yehuda never followed through; when Yehuda's wife died and he went on a little grief vacation to Timno, Tomor dressed as a harlot and covered her face in a veil. She deceived Yehuda, who did not recognize her, into sex, and becomes pregnant.

A little bit more about sperm.